Harrassment or adoration?

Dear Irongoddess,

I recently went to a government office to renew my driver's license and while waiting for my turn, I noticed a man glancing at me. Then after I finished doing what I needed to get done, I walked out of the office and there the man was. "Excuse me", he said. I ignored him and continued walking out of the building complex but he followed me and kept addressing me, even offering me a lift. I told him I was in a rush, didn't have time to talk and that I didn't need a lift, but he continued after me.

Obviously, I was not interested as I evidently rushed off, not even bothering to look at him. My question ... why do men do this sort of thing? Can't they just respect rejection?

Jane, a little teed-off

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Dear Jane,

First of all, just be thankful that he didn't follow you out to your car or wherever you were headed (well, at least I hope he didn't). Just realise that men like that just don't understand NO. Perhaps this has something to do with the old caveman attitude of pulling a woman into his cave by her hair. And just remember also, that possibly at some point, this man's overt attitude of hitting on a woman may have actually worked for him in the past. This bad behaviour may have actually been reinforced by some woman's positive reaction.

I say, just let it go, you weren't hurt. There is a strange upside in this though ... you're a hot woman whom men oogle over ... and there are many lonely woman out there who would love to have an ounce of the attention that you just received.

Next time though, when addressed undesirably, don't say a word and just ignore him. Your reacting at all opened a door for communication. Let's just hope that you will never be placed in a situation that you will have to scream and run away.

The Irongoddess

China's Sexual Revolution

Check out the new project that I worked on which will be airing on Thursday November 8, 2007 at 9pm on CBC-TV. I did the narrative voices for the radio host and Muzimei the blogger and others.

http://www.cbc.ca/doczone/sexualrevolution.html

CHINA'S SEXUAL REVOLUTION
Thursday November 8, 2007 at 9pm on CBC-TVrepeating Saturday November 10 at 10pm ET on CBC Newsworld

You've heard about China's Cultural Revolution and its sizzling Economic Revolution. But you haven't heard about its other great social upheaval - the Chinese Sexual Revolution - and like everything in that country it's happening at warp speed.

It's China's version of the 60s revolution - on steroids.

CHINA'S SEXUAL REVOLUTION is the world's first glimpse - often using secret cameras - into this forbidden new China. It's a surprising portrait of the Chinese today: the new free love generation that's left their parents in shock; the booming sex industry that's creating an HIV crisis; the new generation of career women and feminists that suddenly wants it all - while millions of men feel left out.

He never would have thought ...

I recently went to a potluck supper to say bon voyage to Jonathan Clark who has now gone off to India to study with Steve McCurry, an incredible National Geographic photographer most reknown for his infamous picture of the "Afghan Girl":



After supper and dessert and with overstuffed tummies, we all got to telling stories and inevitably, the subject of sex came up. It's interesting how this one subject takes so much space in our society. More interestingly, what came out of our discussion was one fella's remark, "I never knew women talked about sex."

Baby, we don't just talk about it, we go into all the nitty gritty details. Then in front of your faces, we pretend we've never said a thing to each other. We discuss the talent of those who can spell the alphabet with their tongues and laugh about the utter boredom of those who have only one speed, one direction, who inevitably can't even keep themselves propped up except by resting on their teeth - OUCH! We know who curves right, who curves left, and who's got a pencil dick ... who's a boob man and who's a butt man. Need I say more?

The men at the party agreed ... The women had them beat at "sex talk" and even poked fun at themselves, "Yeah, I banged her real good last night. She really wanted it."