When it FINALLY hit me that I would lose my mother to an incurable cancer, my heart and soul cried out in anguish and that "little girl" inside of me, with insecure, selfish, little girl needs of love and affection, awakened and wailed.
I realised how much I still needed my mother.
And though I knew it would be difficult, the inevitability was that I would have to let her go, ready or not. So, for every day that I still had my mother, I loved her as deeply and tenderly as I could.
Some people have bitterness and resentment towards their parents during their adult lives. I felt none of this towards my mother and realised that life was too short for blame. Could haves, would haves, should haves. None of this meant anything in the face of death. No point in ruminating over what wasn't perfect, for the Universe knows I was far from it.
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I dedicate the following to my beloved mother, Mei Ling, who passed away peacefully on April 24, 2009 after a courageous three-year battle with cancer.
I will always love and miss you, Mom ...
Native American Prayer
I give you this one thought to keep
I am with you still – I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn rain
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight
I am the soft stars that shine at night
Do not think of me as gone
I am with you still – in each new dawn.
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