First of all, my apologies for the tardiness of the results to my nifty social experiment ... been taking advantage of summer, that is, inbetween all the rain.
Alright ... in June, I posted "48 hours on Craigslist" where I placed two ads on Craigslist, one asking for a "forever-and-ever" type of relationship, the other asking for raunchy NSA sex (that's "no-strings-attached", folks). In my previous post, I delivered my findings on the second ad ... now it's time to examine the results to the first one:
Looking for Mr. Right - w4m - 33
Young professional ready to settle down and concentrate on the bigger picture. Would definitely love to start a family. I've devoted most of my 20's to studying and my career, putting my love life on hold. Now I'm ready to explore and discover what's out there!
I like candle-lit suppers, long walks in nature, and relaxed Sunday mornings with coffee and a good book. Though people might describe me as shy and reserved, I'm actually quite adventurous with the right person if I feel comfortable enough. I'm not super into fitness but do enjoy cycling and rollerblading from time to time and try to live a healthy lifestyle, though I do like nice wines.
Hoping you are out there somewhere, waiting for me, to start a caring, loving relationship based on honesty, respect and true intimacy ... xo
While composing this ad, I tried to write from the point of view of an intelligent, sweet, not-too-experienced girl ... someone a little shy and unpresuming but had direction and wouldn't intimidate most men with her interests or activities. I tried to list common things that most people would like, making her blend easily into or compliment most lifestyles.
Basically, I tried to make her as "vanilla" as possible without making her appear too boring.
The only element that I added to throw a guy off was her strong desire to find that "knight in shining armour", settle down and have kids, something which gives most men who just want to have a "good time" the heebie-jeebies.
Surprisingly, I received 21 letters, two within the first hour of posting on Craigslist! Are there really this many men out there who are looking for a meaningful relationship?
Could the ratio of men who want Commitment vs. Casual Sex really be as high as 1:5?
*Based on the responses received by both Craigslist postings
Here are the stats:
- Of the 61.9% that stated their age, the average was 33.9, the youngest being 25, and the oldest being 52 (I'm listed in my ad as 33.)
- 47.6% of the letters contained spelling or grammatical errors
- 14.3% of the respondents sent pics ... yes, of their faces, no body shots (a total of three men)
Mind you, taking a closer look at the emails received, I quickly realised that the majority of the men who responded were not actually interested in a relationship. They were looking for an audience or an admirer ... as I surmised from the almost total lack of interest in what I'd written in my Craigslist ad.
Many of the emails were evidently form letters, monologues about these men, who they were and what they wanted. Only a few made even a single comment about what they found interesting about my CL post which was that they too had left relationships on the backburner for too long.
Shortest email to try to woo me ... I almost fainted when I realised I'd found my soulmate at last! :
hiwhats your statsprofessional 30m asianThen of course, my heart skipped a beat when I read this gentlemen's email:
"I am the one you are looking"Hello! I am a Professional black man looking for a female who loves to kiss , make love , love to get oral sex ,do fun things together and be in business together, maybe have a family and someone who I can trust ,preferably, for fun and cool conversation ...Maybe he is "The One?" Like, what woman doesn't like to receive oral sex?
JACKPOT!Well, if I decide that he is not The One, then surely one of the other eight women he group emailed would think so. And if they don't think so, then maybe some other woman on Craigslist would think so. This man gets credit for his efficiency ... he sent out his CL ad verbatim as his love letter. Like, why fiddle with perfection?
Of course though, if I wanted to satisfy both my "carnal sexual hedonistic" AND "sweet innocent commitment-seeking" sides, I could always go for this guy, who wrote back to both of my CL ads:
Hi there!I am D***. I am 25 and live in montreal. So you are horny. Can you keep it longer enough. Like all night. Are you sexualy strong enough. If you are i am up for it. write me back. if you are interested. Take care have fun. BYEHI there!I am D*** from Montreal. I am 25 years old. My height is 5,6 INC. My weight is 145POUNDS. I work in au auto garage 5 days a week and have weekend off. My hobbies are going on a long walk, music, movies, swimming, walking, and playing soccer. I go to GYM time to time. I love to laugh and make other people laugh. I am very talkative person. Thats all about me. If there is anything you would like to know about me just ask me. I would be more happy to answer your question. Thanks for reading my email. You have a wonderful day. Take care BYEWell, maybe not ... that second letter seems a little monologuish and doesn't even show me that he's even read my ad ... (don't make the same mistake with internet dating, fellas!)But I did receive one particularly interesting letter and was actually quite impressed with it ... I'm not at liberty to disclose the entire letter, but let's just say that he ended one fun paragraph with:So it seems within the last 24h (or next 2) pretty did all the things you enjoyed based on your description!!!Wow ... I had to meet him! I wrote to him and explained that I was doing a social experiment ... would he consent to an interview? Stayed tuned for the next post as the Irongoddess interviews Mr. Maybe.
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