Friday, January 22, 2010

48 Hours on Craigslist: An Interview with Mr. Maybe

Alright folks, it's a New Year and I've somehow skipped over the Holiday Season. How? Well, maybe it had something to do with this or maybe this ...



Frolicking with friends in the French Alps does hold a certain distraction :-D

Alright, alright ... now that we've determined the real issue of my non-blogging, I will accept total responsibility and catch you up on something I started last summer.

I am a lost sheep returning to the fold ... it is the New Year, right? ... Right? All is forgiven?

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Mr. Maybe agreed to meet me in a café/bar in a trendy part of town. He was actually already there when I arrived.

Promptness ... check!

I sat down on the bar stool beside him in front of the window and immediately fell off. I promptly moved the interview to a cosy little table where I couldn't embarrass myself further ... I am the Irongoddess after all and can't be seen sprawled across the floor of a public establishment!

Profile of Mr. Maybe (aka "Rodger"):

- slim, well-dressed man, early 30's, European background
- tidy appearance and hairstyle, clean-shaven

Presentation ... check!

- likes his job, works as an analyst but is far from being a computer geek
- soft-spoken, very polite
- never been married, no children
- hasn't been in a serious relationship for several years but is open to "seeing where things go", from a short fling to settling down ... doesn't believe in having a double standard if things start out on a more physical note (yes, he would see the girl again!)

Open-minded, comfortable with himself, non-judgmental ... check!

- recreational jogger and cyclist

Fit ... check!

- has been cooking for himself since he moved out 10 years ago ... "I can't live on peanut butter sandwiches!"
- cooking and cleaning have become habits over the years and they have in fact evolved into relaxing activities. Rodger takes comfort and pride in managing his home.

Cooking and cleaning ... CHECK!!!

Mr. Maybe's online dating history:

- Rodger's been dabbling with online dating for a year but has only been on Craigslist for the past 8-9 months
- a friend of his set up a profile for him on Plenty of Fish, but he prefers Craigslist over the other dating websites as it's easier (one-stop website) and he finds it entertaining ("like watching an episode of Seinfeld")
- uses a "form letter response" which he personalises according to the women's posts
- though he didn't remember what I'd written in my fake online post , he usually looks for the following qualities: easy-going, fun, nothing overtly sexual, someone who likes activities
- usually, there is something in particular that will trigger a response from him as he doesn't have a finite shopping list
- has so far only met a few women off the internet, but no one interesting enough to continue dating
- like me, he also asks the question, "Why would a guy want to take a picture of his own cock and why would a woman want to see it?" CHECK!!

Mr. Maybe's dating preferences:

- as Rodger comes from a large traditional household (8 kids!), he'd prefer a more traditional relationship with stereotypical male/female roles ... perhaps this is just "old school" conditioning according to him
- he admits though that he's not handy at all around the house and it's not essential that his partner cook
- he's remarked that in some of his friend's relationships, some of the women seem lost if they are not in the traditional role, but for himself, what counts most is that "at the end of the day, things have to get done."
- though he could date a sporty girl, he wouldn't want someone who was competitive
- Rodger likes girly-girls and actually finds their materialistic shopping habits kinda sexy, probably because he prefers a well-dressed, stylish, refined woman who takes pride in her appearance
- likes a confident woman who is not afraid in expressing who she is

Mr. Maybe's 5 words to describe Ms. Right:

Pretty, perky, intelligent, focused and fit

Mr. Maybe's 5 words to describe himself:

Easy-going, confident, funny, family and friend-oriented

Overall, I found Mr. Maybe to be quite pleasant and was amazed when he was astute enough to recognize the perfume I was wearing ("White Musk" from the Body Shop) ... AND he paid for my coffee! What a gentleman!

Closing comment on his first email to me:
"Although I like to cook for others, it may be best that we meet at a restaurant first to show you I am not a weirdo!!!"
A very sweet, sincere and charming fella, a little quirky but in a good way, and assuredly Mr. Right for some lucky girl out there ... write me if you're interested!


"If you lose your way, I will help you find it."